How can I push the video stream to my custom RTMP server

my jitsi-meet version is 2.0.5162

Not sure if that version supports custom RTMP out-of-the-box, but if it does, just enter your RTMP url in the text box followed by a forward slash (/) and then your stream key.

lets kick this to the top again were working on this also

do you mean server or player? ex: jibri sends to youtube, thats a player.

Jibri can stream to any RTMP(S) URL. YouTube is just another RTMP URL, Jitsi just happens to treat it specially by using YouTube’s RTMP URL automatically when you only provide a stream key.

The UI doesn’t make it clear, but you can put any RTMP(S) URL in the box that asks for a YouTube stream key. If you have a separate stream key, do as @Freddie says, append it to the end of the URL, separated by a forward slash (/).

Note that there is a whitelist in Jibri (jibri.streaming.rtmp-allow-list in jibri.conf) so your RTMP URL will need to be allowed there.

yes you can, as freddie says just enter your RTMP url in the text box:
example: rtmp://:1935/live/freddie

the IP goes before the 1935 and is separated by a colon
make sure you have jibri also